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Kim's Titties

Can we please calm our tits about Kim Kardashian’s tits?

I’m not going to lie, I haven’t actually read a full article, followed all the tweets or seen the original photo of Mrs West baring her breasts. However, I still have an opinion on this very polarising matter: of pretty much no opinion- at least on Kim’s two cans.

Why do we still care as a society on how much a woman, young or old, pops out a teat or two, exposes a bit more than just her clavicle or just gives us an eye full of side boob? People on the internet love a good debate on whether or not a woman has been appropriate, prudish or just a down right ‘sloot’ with her body. A couple of weeks ago the internet was declaring Susan Sarandon as too old to show us her cleavage. Umm hello; Susan’s body is just bangin’! And if even it isn’t pleasing to your overly sensitive eyes, please just divert them to something else, no one is asking you to oggle them. At the beginning of young Lena Dunham’s career people were begging her to stop showing her body on her show.Thank you Lena for fvcking those people right off! I love your body and I love your show!! Who freaking cares internet.. You don’t have to look if you don’t want to.

To all those exclaiming to Kim what a terrible role model she is to young women out there by posing in the nudester; I am baffled. Everyone else remembers that she (cum-) shot to stardom through her bedroom video prowess, right? Then was just famous for being a spoilt reality TV star with her rich family?? I don’t think the Unbreakable Kim(my) (Sch)Titts was ever on the path of helping young women better themselves for tomorrow. No – young women of the next generation – you do not have to break out your melons and show off your bald eagle to receive the empowerment you crave. Just as you don’t have to dress like you’re going to church everyday just to please society’s conjecture of your morality. You get to dress in as much or as little as you bloody well please because, well, it’s your bloody life.

After all this, will I now go look at Kimmy’s latest “knock it out of the park” knockers photo? Probably not. I see enough of these bangin’ bodies in advertisements selling me shit I don’t need through gratuitous sex and sexiness. We know what these bodies look like and it just does not interest me.But for all those who it does appeal to, please, by all means, no judgements here; go take a quick squiz before social media deems another woman’s body just too inappropriate for today’s society.

Who wore it best? Nipple 1 or Nipple 2?


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